Sunday, July 31, 2011
Friday, July 29, 2011
Just a minute - haven't you posted this before?
Well yes actually, I have.
Back in March I wrote the below post but was thinking about it again yesterday and sniggering to myself so I thought it was worth re-hashing. Enjoy.
I was listening to Irish Radio today - an often painful experience where particularly bad quiz shows are par for the course. And when I say bad I mean bad. If you don't believe me I only have to tell you that Ireland once had a TV quiz show called Quicksilver where the prize that the contestants competed for started at - wait for it - 1p. That's right, one pence. After that it went up in increments of 3p or 5p. Heady days. And that was Television. You can just imagine what the radio ones were like.
Truth is they haven't improved much. But listening to the radio today brought back to me one in particular - Larry Gogan's 'Just a minute quiz' where contestants had one minute to answer as many questions as possible, sometimes with hilarious outcomes. Larry had a catch phrase for those who didn't do so well 'Ah sure the questions didn't really suit you'; he probably thought it lessoned the blow of public humiliation. I can't recall what the prize was but suffice to say it was more than likely a mug.
So, for your enjoyment I thought I'd grab a few of the questions and, ahem, answers from the archives for you.
Actual answers given to Larry Gogan on the Just a Minute Quiz.
1) Something a blind man might use?
A Sword
2) A Song with the word Moon in the title?
Blue Suede Moon
3) Name the Capital of France?
F
4) Name a bird with a long Neck?
Naomi Campbell
5) Name an occupation where you might need a torch?
A burglar
6) Where is the Taj Mahal?
Opposite the Dental Hospital
7) What is Hitlers first name ?
Heil
8) A dangerous race ?
The Arabs
9) Something that floats in a bath ?
Water
10) A famous Royal ?
Mail
11) A famous bridge ?
The Bridge Over Troubled Waters
12) Something you do in the bathroom ?
Decorate
13) A method of securing your home ?
Put the kettle on
14) Something associated with pigs ?
The Police
15) Something people might be allergic to ?
Skiing
16) Something you do before you go to bed ?
Sleep
17) Something you put on walls ?
A roof
18) A Jacket Potato topping ?
Jam
19) Something you open other than a door ?
Your bowels
20) Finish the sentence 'As happy as.....'
Contestant: (silence)
Larry: Think of my name.
Contestant: 'A pig in shit'.
And here's my personal favourite:
Larry: (after a caller got none of 18 questions right) - "Ah sure the questions didn't really suit you did they?"
Contestant "Ah go and fuck off Larry you're only an old bollox."
Now surely that should be worth a penny.
Back in March I wrote the below post but was thinking about it again yesterday and sniggering to myself so I thought it was worth re-hashing. Enjoy.
I was listening to Irish Radio today - an often painful experience where particularly bad quiz shows are par for the course. And when I say bad I mean bad. If you don't believe me I only have to tell you that Ireland once had a TV quiz show called Quicksilver where the prize that the contestants competed for started at - wait for it - 1p. That's right, one pence. After that it went up in increments of 3p or 5p. Heady days. And that was Television. You can just imagine what the radio ones were like.
Truth is they haven't improved much. But listening to the radio today brought back to me one in particular - Larry Gogan's 'Just a minute quiz' where contestants had one minute to answer as many questions as possible, sometimes with hilarious outcomes. Larry had a catch phrase for those who didn't do so well 'Ah sure the questions didn't really suit you'; he probably thought it lessoned the blow of public humiliation. I can't recall what the prize was but suffice to say it was more than likely a mug.
So, for your enjoyment I thought I'd grab a few of the questions and, ahem, answers from the archives for you.
Actual answers given to Larry Gogan on the Just a Minute Quiz.
1) Something a blind man might use?
A Sword
2) A Song with the word Moon in the title?
Blue Suede Moon
3) Name the Capital of France?
F
4) Name a bird with a long Neck?
Naomi Campbell
5) Name an occupation where you might need a torch?
A burglar
6) Where is the Taj Mahal?
Opposite the Dental Hospital
7) What is Hitlers first name ?
Heil
8) A dangerous race ?
The Arabs
9) Something that floats in a bath ?
Water
10) A famous Royal ?
11) A famous bridge ?
The Bridge Over Troubled Waters
12) Something you do in the bathroom ?
Decorate
13) A method of securing your home ?
Put the kettle on
14) Something associated with pigs ?
The Police
15) Something people might be allergic to ?
Skiing
16) Something you do before you go to bed ?
Sleep
17) Something you put on walls ?
A roof
18) A Jacket Potato topping ?
Jam
19) Something you open other than a door ?
Your bowels
20) Finish the sentence 'As happy as.....'
Contestant: (silence)
Larry: Think of my name.
Contestant: 'A pig in shit'.
And here's my personal favourite:
Larry: (after a caller got none of 18 questions right) - "Ah sure the questions didn't really suit you did they?"
Contestant "Ah go and fuck off Larry you're only an old bollox."
Now surely that should be worth a penny.
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Listography - Lessons I learned from my parents
Last Sunday evening as I sat on a balcony in Spain sipping red wine with my sister we inevitably got onto the subject of our childhood and the valuable lessons we had learned from our parents.
Now I'm not talking about the 'don't fart in a swimming pool' type lessons either (though they do have their place) - I'm talking about the real deal - the lessons that you want to pass down to your own children too. Which of course got me to thinking (dangerous business I know)....
So this weeks Listography is Top 5 Lessons I learned from my parents.
Mine are:
1. How to cook.
I'm not quite sure how my mum turned out to be such a good cook. She grew up an only child whose parents had maids and cooks, and then went off to boarding school. So by all accounts she should have been a spoilt little rich kid who didn't know how to boil an egg. But she wasn't, and she does. Our childhoods were filled with the smells of homebaked bread, chocolate cakes, pans of bubbling marmalade, roast chickens, whole salmons, pies, quiches, curries and yes, even boiled eggs. We all learned the art through watching her. Greatest gift ever.
2. Never judge someone until you've walked a mile in their shoes.
Actually I have shamelessly robbed this from my sister but only because she vocalised it better than me. I remember my lovely dad always making sure we gave people the benefit of the doubt when judging them, so the lady who had been really rude to me in the supermarket became the lady who had just had some really bad news and the drunk on the side of the road became the boy who grew up in care...And who was I to point the finger from my nice comfy middle class life?
3. That trust is a powerful thing.
As the forth of five children, by the time it came to my teens I think my parents were too bloody knackered to try to start enforcing rules all over again. So lucky me was allowed to do and go pretty much whatever and wherever I liked. The thing was I never really did or went anywhere I shouldn't. There was nothing to rebel against so I didn't.
When I first started smoking about five minutes after starting university my dad agreed to pay me £500 to give up - £250 after six months and the other £250 after the next six months. So I stopped. My friends couldn't understand why I didn't just say I had quit and then collect the dosh. But of course I couldn't, 'cause the smart fecker had guilted me into it by trusting me.
4. That homebrew really is very strong.
Getting your ten year old to siphon your homemade wine into bottles by sucking through the tube is NOT a good idea.
5. That success isn't related to money.
I grew up in a big beautiful house with a big beautiful garden, but my parents drove old bangers and we were always the last on the planet to get any new mod cons or technology into our house (though I do remember playing table tennis on an old Commodore64....but that was probably only a few years ago). Anyway - my Dad always said to me 'Success is happiness'. Simple but true. He was a wise old soul my Pops.
So there's mine. Now it's your turn to delve into the depths of your childhood and drag forth those life lessons that made you who you are today. Write your post on your own blog and then come back here and add your details to the linky below.
Can't wait to read them!
Now I'm not talking about the 'don't fart in a swimming pool' type lessons either (though they do have their place) - I'm talking about the real deal - the lessons that you want to pass down to your own children too. Which of course got me to thinking (dangerous business I know)....
So this weeks Listography is Top 5 Lessons I learned from my parents.
Mine are:
1. How to cook.
I'm not quite sure how my mum turned out to be such a good cook. She grew up an only child whose parents had maids and cooks, and then went off to boarding school. So by all accounts she should have been a spoilt little rich kid who didn't know how to boil an egg. But she wasn't, and she does. Our childhoods were filled with the smells of homebaked bread, chocolate cakes, pans of bubbling marmalade, roast chickens, whole salmons, pies, quiches, curries and yes, even boiled eggs. We all learned the art through watching her. Greatest gift ever.
2. Never judge someone until you've walked a mile in their shoes.
Actually I have shamelessly robbed this from my sister but only because she vocalised it better than me. I remember my lovely dad always making sure we gave people the benefit of the doubt when judging them, so the lady who had been really rude to me in the supermarket became the lady who had just had some really bad news and the drunk on the side of the road became the boy who grew up in care...And who was I to point the finger from my nice comfy middle class life?
3. That trust is a powerful thing.
As the forth of five children, by the time it came to my teens I think my parents were too bloody knackered to try to start enforcing rules all over again. So lucky me was allowed to do and go pretty much whatever and wherever I liked. The thing was I never really did or went anywhere I shouldn't. There was nothing to rebel against so I didn't.
When I first started smoking about five minutes after starting university my dad agreed to pay me £500 to give up - £250 after six months and the other £250 after the next six months. So I stopped. My friends couldn't understand why I didn't just say I had quit and then collect the dosh. But of course I couldn't, 'cause the smart fecker had guilted me into it by trusting me.
4. That homebrew really is very strong.
Getting your ten year old to siphon your homemade wine into bottles by sucking through the tube is NOT a good idea.
5. That success isn't related to money.
I grew up in a big beautiful house with a big beautiful garden, but my parents drove old bangers and we were always the last on the planet to get any new mod cons or technology into our house (though I do remember playing table tennis on an old Commodore64....but that was probably only a few years ago). Anyway - my Dad always said to me 'Success is happiness'. Simple but true. He was a wise old soul my Pops.
So there's mine. Now it's your turn to delve into the depths of your childhood and drag forth those life lessons that made you who you are today. Write your post on your own blog and then come back here and add your details to the linky below.
Can't wait to read them!
Thursday, July 21, 2011
My Lost Weekend
As you may know I spent last weekend at Benicassim in Spain. Three days of unsupervised mayhem. During those days (and mostly nights) I may or may not have done some of the following:
- Had an actual pain in my chest as I said goodbye to the kids
- Downed a bottle of rescue remedy
- Got over-excited on the first night and thus missed the second night
- Danced to Art Brut
- Swooned to The Strokes
- Got on the wrong bus
- Did my back in
- Spent 2 hours walking home at 5am
- Ate Paella
- Swam in the sea
- Saw bits of Mumfords, Professor Green and Elbow
- Burnt my feet on the hot sand
- Got the best massage of my life
- Missed Arctic Monkeys and Primal Scream
- Celebrated my and my sisters joint birthday
- Watched the fabulous The Joy Formidable win over an unknown crowd
- Laughed til I cried at one of my amigos trying to talk in Spanish purely by lisping. ('4 glatheths por favor'. Translation: 4 glasses please)
- Had about 50 anxiety attacks
- Met some lovely people
- Proved to myself that I can actually leave my family without the world ending.
Saturday, July 16, 2011
Listography - Gigs
Firstly thanks to all the lovely new bloggers who joined Listography last week - it's great to see so many new blogs popping up lately. I've already spotted a few that I think will become regulars on my 'must-read' blog list - once I get time to read again of course.
By the time this Listography is published I will be in sunny Spain moshing to Primal Scream, dancing to Arctic Monkeys and swooning at The Strokes at this years Benicassim festival. In homage to this frankly-incredible-that-I-actually-did-it trip this weeks Listography is Top 5 Bands I'd Like To See Live.
Here's mine:
1. Libertines.
Without doubt my most longed to see band. Their albums are works of art and their live performances (not that I've seen any, sob) are \ were masterclasses in energy-fuelled chaos. I love.
2. Bob Marley and the Wailers.
Well I have seen one half of these live and that was quite a gig - though there was so much wacky-tobaccy in the club that night everything was seen threw a hazy glow. Anyway - impossible obviously - but to see Sir Bob sing 'Kaya' would make my life complete.
3. The Doors.
No, not my favourite band in the world, and yes, Jim Morrison was a bit of a dick - but perhaps you have to be to be the ultimate front man (Bono take note).
4. Nirvana
Awesomeness.
5. Elvis
'Cause you'd kind of have to wouldn't you?
I'm quite sure this list will change as soon as I read all your fabulous offerings. Until then Rock On!
(To join in just write your list on your own blog with a link back to here so that all your readers can find the other brilliant entries. Then add your own link to post below. See you when I return!)
(If I return...)
By the time this Listography is published I will be in sunny Spain moshing to Primal Scream, dancing to Arctic Monkeys and swooning at The Strokes at this years Benicassim festival. In homage to this frankly-incredible-that-I-actually-did-it trip this weeks Listography is Top 5 Bands I'd Like To See Live.
Here's mine:
1. Libertines.
Without doubt my most longed to see band. Their albums are works of art and their live performances (not that I've seen any, sob) are \ were masterclasses in energy-fuelled chaos. I love.
2. Bob Marley and the Wailers.
Well I have seen one half of these live and that was quite a gig - though there was so much wacky-tobaccy in the club that night everything was seen threw a hazy glow. Anyway - impossible obviously - but to see Sir Bob sing 'Kaya' would make my life complete.
3. The Doors.
No, not my favourite band in the world, and yes, Jim Morrison was a bit of a dick - but perhaps you have to be to be the ultimate front man (Bono take note).
4. Nirvana
Awesomeness.
5. Elvis
'Cause you'd kind of have to wouldn't you?
I'm quite sure this list will change as soon as I read all your fabulous offerings. Until then Rock On!
(To join in just write your list on your own blog with a link back to here so that all your readers can find the other brilliant entries. Then add your own link to post below. See you when I return!)
(If I return...)
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Too much on my (spinning) plate
As you may have noticed from my lack of blog activity I've been a little busy of late.
What with the school holidays and having to keep three kidsentertained from killing each other it's been a little hectic.
Add in a new home-based part-time job (with three kids in tow), the shopping (with three kids in tow), the cooking, cleaning, bill paying (with three kids in tow), sorting out the other house that our recently moved out tenant trashed, and trying to book the odd appointment for myself so that I don't look like Chewbacca when I go away this weekend and you might just say my sanity has been hanging by a very thin thread.
My days have seen me running from laptop to dishwasher to Tesco's muttering 'I don't know how she does it, I don't know how she does it' repeatedly with a crazed look in my eye and an eyebrow that twitches continuously.
My nights are full of dreams of me running around a Big Top spinning so may plates that when they come crashing down I am buried beneath a mountain of sparkling bone china thinking - 'now why are my plates never that clean?'
So when my husband announced yesterday that he had a bad case of flu \ stomach bug \ I-don't-want-to-go-to-work-itus and spent the day in bed whilst asking me if I could 'pop to the chemist' for him - forgive me if I didn't show due sympathy.
I think all of my compassionate tendencies may have nipped off down the circus with Chewbacca.
What with the school holidays and having to keep three kids
Add in a new home-based part-time job (with three kids in tow), the shopping (with three kids in tow), the cooking, cleaning, bill paying (with three kids in tow), sorting out the other house that our recently moved out tenant trashed, and trying to book the odd appointment for myself so that I don't look like Chewbacca when I go away this weekend and you might just say my sanity has been hanging by a very thin thread.
My days have seen me running from laptop to dishwasher to Tesco's muttering 'I don't know how she does it, I don't know how she does it' repeatedly with a crazed look in my eye and an eyebrow that twitches continuously.
My nights are full of dreams of me running around a Big Top spinning so may plates that when they come crashing down I am buried beneath a mountain of sparkling bone china thinking - 'now why are my plates never that clean?'
So when my husband announced yesterday that he had a bad case of flu \ stomach bug \ I-don't-want-to-go-to-work-itus and spent the day in bed whilst asking me if I could 'pop to the chemist' for him - forgive me if I didn't show due sympathy.
I think all of my compassionate tendencies may have nipped off down the circus with Chewbacca.
Saturday, July 9, 2011
Listography - Ice Creams
Well after all the controversy this week (and I don't mean at News of the World) I am delighted to be running full speed into the frivolous arms of Listography.
And seeing as its (supposed) to be Summer, this week it Top 5 favourite ice-creams ( or pops). Easy huh?
Here's mine:
1. Brunch.
An oldie but a goodie. Reminds me of childhood and other classics such as Fat Frogs and Kilamanjaros. By all accounts - with soft perfumed orange and pink biscuit bits covering it - should be disgusting.
2. Cornetto (Classic)
Still feels like an indulgence. Probably because I wasn't allowed one 'til I was about 12.
3. Magnum.
I ate my own body weight in Magnums when I was pregnant. It's true.
Any of them would do really, but if I had a gun to my head it would have to be the almond one (quite why someone would want to shoot a pregnant lady if she didn't choose her favourite Magnum I'm not sure).
5. Mars
Too good to be true.
Surprisingly I don't have any 'pops' in my list - I thought at least one would sneak in, but not so. The chocoholic in me took over.
Your turn now. If you're new to Listography you can read a little about it here. Then all you need to do is write your own list on your blog and then come back here and enter your posts url into the linky list below. And don't forget to visit some others in the list too.
Clear as mud?
And seeing as its (supposed) to be Summer, this week it Top 5 favourite ice-creams ( or pops). Easy huh?
Here's mine:
1. Brunch.
An oldie but a goodie. Reminds me of childhood and other classics such as Fat Frogs and Kilamanjaros. By all accounts - with soft perfumed orange and pink biscuit bits covering it - should be disgusting.
2. Cornetto (Classic)
Still feels like an indulgence. Probably because I wasn't allowed one 'til I was about 12.
3. Magnum.
I ate my own body weight in Magnums when I was pregnant. It's true.
Any of them would do really, but if I had a gun to my head it would have to be the almond one (quite why someone would want to shoot a pregnant lady if she didn't choose her favourite Magnum I'm not sure).
4. Wibbly Wobbly Wonders
Oddly delicious.
5. Mars
Too good to be true.
Surprisingly I don't have any 'pops' in my list - I thought at least one would sneak in, but not so. The chocoholic in me took over.
Your turn now. If you're new to Listography you can read a little about it here. Then all you need to do is write your own list on your blog and then come back here and enter your posts url into the linky list below. And don't forget to visit some others in the list too.
Clear as mud?
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
Part II
I don't really have the time or inclination to blog tonight but I guess it's important to set the record straight and put it out there that Britmums have apologised to me for this and have invited me back to their site.
So I'd just like to publicly say - apology accepted and appreciated. Thank you Britmums.
Just not sure you'll see me over there anytime soon.
Also - the support I received from you guys was truly humbling and amazing - I know I didn't reply at the time but each one was noted.
So that's it. Case closed. Cake anyone?
So I'd just like to publicly say - apology accepted and appreciated. Thank you Britmums.
Just not sure you'll see me over there anytime soon.
Also - the support I received from you guys was truly humbling and amazing - I know I didn't reply at the time but each one was noted.
So that's it. Case closed. Cake anyone?
Monday, July 4, 2011
Netmums, Britmums, Me and The Ban.
I've been debating whether or not to write this post since it happened.
To do so seemed churlish, to not to seemed like I had something to hide.
Having received a few tweets since then which asked 'What on earth did you do to get banned?' I decided that yes, I probably should...
So, without dramatising it all too much here's my side of the story.
I started blogging about 9 months ago and joined Britmums almost immediately. I found it friendly, interesting and a great source for stumbling across other blogs.
I've been working with Netmums for the past few months building a Bloggers Review Team - basically matching up bloggers with brands for product review purposes.
On the back of this Netmums decided that these (and other) great blogs needed a wider audience and so began developing the Netmums Parents Bloggers Network.
On Friday the Network was launched.
On Saturday I received an email from another blogger advising that there were some questions being posed over on Britmums regarding the Netmums Network and would I be able to answer them.
I popped over and responded to the question that I knew the answer of and said that I would find out about the rest.
I think it was Sunday morning that I went back and responded to another post on the same thread by one of the Britmums founders which referred to the fact that Netmums should have used a link rather than a pop up for the blogs (which in my opinion is completely wrong as it's the pop up functionality that is so brilliant about the Netmums Network).
Anyway little later, having found out the answers to the remaining two questions that had been posed, I went back to Britmums to supply the answers.
Only problem was that I couldn't, because I had been banned from using it. The related email referred the fact that I had been using Britmums for the purposes of a competitor - or words to that affect.
So that's the story. The only points I'd like to make are:
1. Britmum is a closed community for bloggers only. Netmums Parents Bloggers Network is for showcasing blogs to their audience of 4 million+ hits a month.
2. I was not there 'spying' or doing anything untoward - I had been requested to answer some of their members' questions and was trying to do so.
3. Whatever their fears were would it not have been a little more grown up to just discuss them with me first?
Anyway - what is done is done. Water under the bridge. Their site, their decision.
Finally can I just say thank you to anyone and everyone who sent me lovely emails, tweets, msgs and comments - I didn't respond to many on Twitter as I didn't really think it was the place to air any grievances. And to those that quit Britmums in my support - there was really no need but I appreciate the gesture!
The End.
Listography - Things I want to do this Summer
Excuse my absence from Listography lately - I've been a little tied up helping out with this amazing new bloggers portal by Netmums:
http://www.netmums.com/bloggers/
If you haven't seen it yet go and have a look - I defy you not to love it!
Anyway - back to Listography. The lovely Reluctant Housedad has once again offered his services and is hosting this week. I promise to be back with it on my blog next week - but for now he'll just have to do ;)
Here's his lovely post. Please join in.
http://www.netmums.com/bloggers/
If you haven't seen it yet go and have a look - I defy you not to love it!
Anyway - back to Listography. The lovely Reluctant Housedad has once again offered his services and is hosting this week. I promise to be back with it on my blog next week - but for now he'll just have to do ;)
Here's his lovely post. Please join in.
